so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Randomize
