I will die if light touches me.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
