I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
