normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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