Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Randomize
