i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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