I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
