Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
