Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
