That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
