She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize