he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
