Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Randomize