Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
