Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Randomize