Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
