Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Porn is love you can see.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize