soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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