I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
