how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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