Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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