Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Well I just put wine in my tea
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
