he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
this will be a night to untag.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I love you. Go after that dick
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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