The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize