She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize