he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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