Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
