Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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