i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
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