I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
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