I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
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