16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
