I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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