We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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