Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Randomize
