dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Randomize