just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
