Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize