Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Randomize
