yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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