She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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