Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
