I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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