Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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