she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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