it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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