I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize