the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
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