I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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