I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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